Miley Cyrus and The Farce of Virginity

This past week, Miley Cyrus spoke with TV Guide (sidenote: who the hell reads OR buys TV Guide anymore?  That’s really what I’d like to know) about some bullshit, I dunno.  You can call me “over the hill” all you want, but Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana (whatever the hell the difference is) is something that I never “got,” nor do I think I care to “get.”  Even with all the Vanity Fair scandal, I still didn’t really care to pay attention to her much.  However, it is this kind of holier-than-thou virginity bullshit that really kind of pisses me off. 

Oh, but first of all, in response to a question about what type of things she’d like to see herself working on in the future, Miley responded: “I’d love to do a younger, cleaner version of Sex and the City.” 

Umm, all the materialist brainwashing aside, wasn’t the fact that it was a show about older women, who would otherwise be commonly relegated and pigeonholed as sexless dried up old maids, talking (allegedly) honestly and openly about sex, like, the WHOLE POINT OF THE SHOW?  What the hell would the point be to make a “cleaner” (whatever the fuck that even means, as though sex is somehow “dirty”) version? 

Oh, it gets better.  Here’s Miley talking about her “purity ring” (shudder):

I like to think of myself as the girl that no one can get, that no one can keep in their hand. Even at my age, a lot of girls are starting to fall and I think if [staying a virgin] is a commitment girls make, that’s great.

OK.  Back the fuck up.  WHAT?!?!??!?!   I know if I had a daughter, I CERTAINLY would not want Miley “Purity Ring” Cyrus to be ANYONE for her to look up to.  in my opinion, purity rings are a bunch of bullshit white, Christian people do to make themselves feel better about their idiocy and to justify their audacious self righteousness and intrusive style of religion.  Why must a woman or girl’s value be placed on what she does or does not do with her fucking vagina?  What kind of message does THAT send? 

If Miley Cyrus wants to pose spread eagle on the cover of Vanity Fair, be my fucking guest, but if she wants to preach to me/the public about what an upstanding citizen she is because her father controls her mind and sexuality, I’m sorry, but that’s fucking bullshit.  There are so many awful things wrong with that last quote, I don’t even know where to begin.  First of all, having consensual sex at 16 with someone doesn’t mean that that someone “has” you, or is “keeping you in their hand,” whatever that even means.  In my opinion, people should have consentual sex when they feel they’re emotionally mature to do so.  It’s a choice very specific to that individual.  And you know what?  If they make a mistake, that doesn’t mean they’ve failed as a human being!  You know why?  Because there is a lot more to girls and women than when they choose to have sex, or who they choose to have sex with.  Who the fuck is this pushy fucking scumbag actress to tell ANYONE that they’ve “fallen” if they have sex before marriage?  Or rather, who the fuck is Billy Ray Cyrus to control how his daughter feels?  Or anyone else’s daughter feel about anything?

Oh, and to illustrate what a bastion of morality she claims to be, here are her 7 things she can’t live without:

1) “The Bible. It’s my ‘how-to’ guide for life.” 2) “My mommy!” 3) “My Yorkie Roadie and my lovebird Zazu.” 4) “Grilled cheese. Mmm…” 5) “Music and my beautiful Gibson guitar.” 6) “My black Chuck Taylor Converse sneakers.” 7) “My Sidekick.”

This basically makes me want to gouge my eyes out.  Im sorry you had to read that, but like, anyone who expects me to believe that they are “better” than me should probably not include both “The Bible” (how-to guide for life????  JUST KILL ME NOW) and “My Sidekick” in any top whatever list of bullshit “you” want to say about whatever. 

But, anyway, the bottom line is, how is it more of a positive thing to put other girls down because they’ve had sex or want to have sex?  So, what, they’re just magically supposed to be in touch with their sexuality when (and if) they get married?  How does that help your self esteem again?   Sorry, I’m just having difficulty understanding why being a fucking bitch to other girls is supposed to be something one should aspire to as a young girl.

Oh, and can we touch upon the fact that apparently, the normative definition of a “virgin” means that you have not had your vagina penetrated by a penis?  Why is it that, most of the time, whenever a penis is involved that this is the only type of sex that counts?  So, if you’re a lesbian, does that mean you’ll always be a virgin?  It’s like those people who think they’re virgins even if they have anal and oral sex.  Ridiculous.  Like, you’re a better person because you licked Johnny’s penis as opposed to sticking your vagina on it?  Please.

So, basically, there self-satisfied, self-important virgins can SUCK IT!



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2 responses to “Miley Cyrus and The Farce of Virginity

  1. prometheustherebel

    Can we also note that, in my personal experience, most of the people who subscribe to this whole “purity ring” thing so strongly have already had some form of sexual activity? It’s bananas. BTW, the rant is brilliant, it really made my day!

  2. Pingback: Slut Shaming and Chastity Rings, Part 2 « The Greatest Blog Ever Hula-d

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